2017 Hoodie Awards

i_am_essentialred_hoodieWith 2017 coming to an end it’s that time of year where we give out fictional awards for the best and worst of D.C. statehood happenings over the last year. We have had some highs and lows in the statehood world in 2017 and we are on the cusp of making 2018 the best year for D.C. Statehood ever! We have made a lot of progress this year with numerous lobby days, hundreds of new people joining the movement, a record number of cosponsors on statehood legislation in Congress. And a burgeoning movement for statehood in the 50 states. So much has happened and so many people deserve praise but these awards are  what one person with limited time and no budget thinks was probably the best of the best this year! Without further adieu let’s get to the 2017 Hoodie Award Winners:

Best Commercial: DC Vote

Simply put this commercial is concise and powerful and tells our story well. Please share this ad with on Twitter, Facebook, and with family and friends! 

Best Endorsement: Sierra Club

In early 2017, the DC Chapter of the Sierra Club endorsed DC statehood and then local members Malcolm Kenton and Jeremiah Lowery set about getting the National Sierra Club to endorse DC statehood which finally happened in September 2017! It’s great to have such a great national organization supporting DC statehood! This is a model we should replicate with unions, religious orders, advocacy groups and others to build a national coalition of support for D.C. statehood.

Best New Kid On The Block: Americans for Self Rule

While the fight for statehood is still a few years away we need to make those in Congress who meddle in our affairs scared of us at the ballot box. As such having PAC that goes after those who go after us is vitally important. The folks at Americans for Self Rule deserve our praise, our thanks, and our support!

Best Business: Bailiwick

This business has burst onto the scene with a wonderful line of D.C. themed apparel. Pride in who we are and where we are from is a key component of building a successful movement for equality and Bailiwick’s designs are full of D.C. pride and their 51st State shirt is the best!

Best Business Emeritus: CreateDC

We could have have the success we have without the great graphic design and print work done by CreateDC. Yes, I’m biased has he’s my brother but they do great work and we get a dope D.C. statehood discount. If you want to support a business that supports D.C. statehood then give CreateDC some business and some love!

Best Street Fest: H St. Fest

In 2017, we had a ton of fun at H St. Fest and had hundreds of people stop by our both to learn how they can help the push for statehood. Folks really enjoyed taking photos with our ‘silent Senators’ who for some reason won’t lend their support to the D.C. statehood bill.

Best Hashtag: #HandsOffDC

While #DCStatehood is the hashtag of the statehood movement the #HandsOffDC hashtag created by Councilmember Charles Allen and his wife Jordi Hutchinson helps to succinctly covey our message that we want Congress to keep their dirty little hands off of and out of DC affairs. It’s a great hashtag so don’t forget you use it! There’s also a Hands Off DC Facebook Group you should join!

Best Lobby Day: Kids First Lobby Day

On a Friday afternoon in March over 100 parents and children gathered in the lobby of the Hart Senate Office Building to go to Senate offices having children advocate for right to have congressional representation to vote for of their own when they turn 18. It was a powerful and inspiring event that organizers Emily Rand and Andria Thomas deserve our praise and thanks for! Let’s do it again!

Best Freshmen Class: Sens. Cortez Masto, Hassan, & Van Hollen

It was great to have three newly sworn in Senators add their names to the D.C. Statehood bill now all we need is Sens. Duckworth (D-IL) and Harris (D-CA) to add their names to have all of the newly sworn in Democrat Senators on the bill. We would also welcome all the freshmen Republicans as well!

Worst New Kid On The Block: Tom Garrett

This fucking guy, he had barely been sworn in and was already introducing a bill to gut gun laws in the District of Columbia. Conveniently his congressional district is about an hour car ride away from DC or work with Americans for Self Rule to help send him to an early retirement from Congress. Let’s send him a message in 2018 to keep his Hands Off D.C.

Best Retirement: Jason Chaffetz

Our grand overseer faced with having to serve as Chairman of a Committee that would be overseeing potential wrongdoing of the Trump Administration decided to call it quits in early 2017. Like most bullies deep down he really was just a coward unwilling and unable to stand up to people in his own party so he took the easy road by being a quitter and getting a fat contract with FOX News as a paid contributor. Having threatened to jail our mayor, Council, and other District Government employees during his tenure in the House we are so glad he is gone and hope the door hit him in the ass on his way out.

Biggest Scumbag: Trent Franks

Mr. Moral Superiority Himself (who repeatedly meddled in DC affairs) finally did himself in by asking female staff if they would be surrogates for he and his wife to have more children at the cost of $5 million. While surrogacy is a wonderful thing people choose to do to help others have children IT IS NOT SOMETHING AN EMPLOYER/CONGRESSMAN SHOULD EVER FUCKING ASK OF AN EMPLOYEE. And this dirt bag wanted to do the inseminating himself if you know what I mean. Bye, Felicia!

Biggest Abdication of Responsibility: DC Elected Officials

Yep, it has to be said. While residents should and are leading the movement for statehood our legislature and executive need to get a plan together that shows how we will transition to being a state. The District will have to incur new costs and new responsibilities when we become a state (taking back control of court and prison system) yet no plan has been developed. THIS MUST BE DONE AND DONE SOON. If we were to have a hearing on statehood in the coming years and members of Congress ask us how we’ll take back control of the courts and especially the prison system we will need to have a plan together. If we don’t we’ll be laughed at or worse, ignored. So come on y’all, in 2018 fund the development of a statehood transition plan that lays out all of the costs and logistics of becoming a state so we’re prepared to be state the exact moment we have created the political pressure and will to make it happen!

Biggest Missed Opportunity: Trump’s Inaugural Parade

We missed a big opportunity to highlight our cause at Donald Trump’s Inaugural Parade. We should have hung a Make America Great – Make DC A State sign off of the Wilson Building. It would have gotten a lot of attention and if it pissed him off enough maybe he would actually tweet about D.C. statehood. slide1.jpg

That’s it for this year, let’s all kick some ass for fairness, equality, and D.C. Statehood in 2018!

Josh Burch

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